What I do:

aadambautistaa: The Villain of the Story. When we read comic...

Mon, 20 May 2013 23:39:26 -0400

The Villain of the Story.

When we read comic books, watch movies, and read novels, it’s usually pretty easy to pick out who the villain of the story is. The truth is though, finding the villain of the story you are apart of can be more difficult to find. Could the villain be the person who bullied you, the person who has committed millions of horrendous crimes and has killed people, or even worse, are you the villain of this story?

History books talk about notorious figures from our pasts who seems to fit the criteria of villains through their actions that has ruined peoples lives. Media outlets always seem to have some new story to talk about describing sad events highlighting the destruction humanity can bring. And we have developed our own opinions on who we don’t like and sometimes even consider to be our enemies.

I may even seem the bad guy to have the opinion that there may not even be any villains in this world, especially when we don’t need to look very far to see the darkness and evil that surrounds us. But I’m starting to see how we all grew up believing and learning different values. How even those most ‘evil’ people in this world maybe didn’t have the same opportunities to learn what I believe is right and wrong. So maybe there are no villains in this story, maybe we are all villains, or maybe we’re all just human trying to find our way in life, hoping one day we all figure out what the right path is.

aadambautistaa: Driving Aimlessly. There use to be a time when...

Mon, 20 May 2013 00:00:47 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Driving Aimlessly.

There use to be a time when I would drive around aimlessly within the city limits under the blanket of darkness that people have named night. The silence of a sleeping city was suddenly filled with music that could only be described as a soundtrack to my life while the breath of the evening air could be felt blowing onto my face.

I didn’t know where I was going, but for the first in my life, it didn’t matter to know or to have a destination to end up at - it was more important to just enjoy the ride I was on. Bystanders who I passed probably thought I was lost, but the truth was that it finally felt like I was free from these shackles that were my problems and struggles.

The world seemed to open up as I drove through these endless roads that finally allowed my thoughts to have the room it needed to breath. As the wheels continued to turn in constant motion against the asphalt, a fleeting feeling was felt from within whispering that everything would eventually end up okay as this journey through life continues. As I continued driving aimless under the moonlight that shone brightly through the windshield which shared the vast darken sky with the billions of sparkling stars that are light years away, there was this feeling like this night was mine and nothing would ever taint this moment when everything seemed at peace and right with this world.

aadambautistaa: What’s Their Story? There are days when I catch...

Sun, 19 May 2013 00:25:42 -0400

aadambautistaa:

What’s Their Story?

There are days when I catch myself really looking at the stranger who passes me by, the person who sits across from me on the train on the way to school, or at the face that is among a random crowd and wonder to myself: “What is their story?”

I wonder how their experiences have defined them. How did life lead them to eventually be in the same place I was when our paths crossed, even if our worlds colliding was as insignificant as passing the hundreds of other strangers that day. And I wonder what it would be like to step into their shoes so I could experience the world from their point of view. Would a beautiful day in my eyes would be a gloomy day in theirs as sadness grips their hearts. I question if the five dollar bill in my pocket that I take for granted would mean everything to that stranger that I did not know didn’t have a penny to his name. Would it even be to crazy to imagine that their perception of the colour red may even be completely different than my own?

I wonder about their world. It’s weird to think about how different we really are because we have all grew up experiencing different things. How our definition of sadness and happiness is different because they are based on our own unique experiences that brought out these emotions. I look at these strangers with curiosity because I realize their story is completely different than my own - and there are over 7 billion of these unique stories that I’ll never be able to get to read and truly understand.

aadambautistaa: Have We Met Before. There are times when I...

Sat, 18 May 2013 04:46:35 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Have We Met Before.

There are times when I wonder if I already of managed to cross paths with a person who will one day be part of my life in the future. And if you believe in the concept of destiny, how weird would it be if life kept on pushing us towards the person we were always destined to be with but always just missed meeting?

How funny would it be if you were actually standing right beside your soulmate during a concert a couple years ago, but just no words were spoken? Would it be too hard to believe that you two could of been at the same party, even had a conversation with each other, that has long been forgotten? And what if you two actually crossed paths, even for just a second, on the city streets or on a vacation a long time ago? And if you keep thinking about all these possibilities, you realize just how many forgotten faces you have seen over your lifetime and how you could of already met that person who will one day become the most important person in your life. For all you know, you might of admired them from a far but just didn’t have the courage to go up to them at the time.

Whether you believe in coincidences or fate, you realize just how funny life can be and how small our world really is. And though you may never really figure out whether or not you have already crossed paths with that one person that will mean everything to you, it’s weird thinking of that small possibility that they could of just been a few steps away from you as the world just awaited for the day you two would finally meet.

aadambautistaa: Life Just Hits Us. I don’t know when life just...

Thu, 16 May 2013 05:18:43 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Life Just Hits Us.

I don’t know when life just hits us, but it does at just one point of our lives. It’s as if in this maze of life, we finally hit a wall and feel like we wasted all the time we had just going the wrong way.

Sometimes it just feels like yesterday being kids playing hide and seek or just running around on school fields during recess. It couldn’t be that long being those kids who played played Pokemon games, collected Yugioh cards, spun Beyblades around, played with barbies, or whatever we did back then, could it?

But then why does it seem like a life time ago now? When did it all just become a memory? When did we all grow up no longer in the realm of imagination facing monsters created through our creativities to now in the realm of realism where the monsters are real in the form of strangers, friends, family, and ourselves.

I mean doesn’t it seem like life played a cruel trick on us? Making us want to grow up as fast as possible to just hitting us all at once, wanting us to go back to when we were younger…where we were safe behind our naivety and innocence.

Can someone please tell me, when did life just hit us?

aadambautistaa: Ending Up Alone. I’m afraid of ending up alone....

Thu, 16 May 2013 00:00:00 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Ending Up Alone.

I’m afraid of ending up alone. It’s scary to think that in a world filled with over seven billion people, that you may be not fit in with anyone of them. Does anyone else feel that way?

In novels, movies, and television shows - you always seem to get this happy ending more often than not. You know the ones I’m talking about; the ones that shows how the underdog can get the girl or where even someone who is a beast or a horrifying ogre can still find love. But what happens if you’re one of the people whose flaws can’t be overcome and you’re destined to be alone? It’s a disheartening feeling when this thought manages to find its way into a your mind and gets trapped there.

It’s terrifying to think of the possibility that your search for that feeling of being wanted or needed may never be fulfilled. That no one needs you. You almost get paralyzed by the thought that the feeling of being so lost and alone in a crowd was not something only felt for a portion of your life, but was there to help define what would be the rest of your life. Truth is, it difficult to think that maybe you’re not enough; to feel like you’re not worth anyones time. It’s heart-wrenching to imagine when your story finally comes to a close, that you’ll be the only character left; all alone.

aadambautistaa: Words. Sometimes I feel trapped because I don’t...

Wed, 15 May 2013 00:01:08 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Words.

Sometimes I feel trapped because I don’t know how to fully express how I feel inside. There are a billions of words to chose from that can be put in an assortment of sequences, yet I find it difficult to even think of just one to describe the endless thoughts that wonder through my mind and emotions that manage engulf me each day.

I can feel these frustration build from within, especially during those moments when you believe those perfect string of words were needed to of been said. These moments are the ones where you look back at life and just wonder to yourself if you were able to just say the right things or say those words to make someone truly understand the extent of the emotion you felt inside, than just maybe life would been different than it is now.

I’m envious of those great poets and authors because maybe they have a better time comforting a friend in a time of need, coming up with ways to make someone believe they were beautiful, or finding a way to stop someone from leaving. There are billions of words to choose from - and yet I’m in a sense of disarray to even choose one to say.

aadambautistaa: The Person Behind The Screen. There are times...

Tue, 14 May 2013 00:09:04 -0400

aadambautistaa:

The Person Behind The Screen.

There are times when I wonder who is behind the screen. Haven’t you ever wondered who is that person that you just reblogged from? Who wrote that that text that you just read? And who is responsible for the artwork that you have just admired? Who is the artist, writer, singer, actor/actress, or face behind something you that was amazing.

Are they anything like you imagine them to be? Are they as wise as they appear to be in a couple paragraphs of writing? Are they as happy as they let you believe in photographs? Do they realize how amazing their talents are as believe they are when you look at their painting, drawings, or videos? Or is everything just a facade and they really are nothing like that image you have created in your head.

It’s almost impossible to really know who the person behind the screen is. Would it be too crazy to think that it’s possible that you have already ran into them on the streets without knowing they were the ones responsible for something you felt was inspirational or incredible. Sometimes I wonder who is the person behind the screen.

aadambautistaa: Nightmare. Have you ever felt like that you...

Mon, 13 May 2013 02:28:10 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Nightmare.

Have you ever felt like that you were in a middle of a nightmare that you just couldn’t wake up from? You argue to yourself that reality can’t be this cruel; that life is not this cruel. And as you attempt try to pinch yourself awake in a feeble attempt to escape this hell that you manage to stubble upon, you realize that this is no dream. That this nightmare is real and it is your life.

You wonder how you could ever end up here. When was the moment you started walking down this path littered with dispair and an unexplainable sadness? Or was it through no fault of your own that these monsters found you and you were just defenseless against their acts of torture? Did this darkness just creep up on you when you least expected it to engulf and drown you until it felt like we could no longer breath.

What do you do when you’re living a nightmare that you can’t wake up from? When what terrifies you are no longer just part of your imagination but has become part of your reality? There will be many of us that will be tempted to do anything possible for it come to an premature end. But some of us will be lucky to see that things get better. That it’s possible to live the life we always dreamt of after the nightmare has past.

aadambautistaa: If I Were to Meet You Again. There are some...

Mon, 13 May 2013 00:18:00 -0400

aadambautistaa:

If I Were to Meet You Again.

There are some people in this world that once were an important part of your life. Though it may seem like you two are strangers that have never spoken or seen each other before, part of you doesn’t let you forget how much they once meant to you. Even though an argument, disagreement, or just drifting apart led to the disappearance of this person from your life, you are torn between wanting to run into them and never wanting to see them again.

Don’t you ever wonder what it would be like running into them again? What would you say or what would they say? Or would words even be said as you walked past each other ignoring all the history that stand between the both of you? Would you feel that rush of emotion as you realized how much you missed that person and wonder what could of been if you two stayed in each others lives or be grateful that they are no longer part of your life? Would you two try to catch up with each other and attempt to be in each others lives again, realize it’s too difficult to have the relationship you once had with this person, or just accept this person who once was your world was only destined be in a portion of your life?

It’s scary to think of the possibilities that come with meeting that person again. Because the person is not just another stranger or someone that you know nothing about; but someone whose world once collided with yours with such force that it defined you for the rest of your life. Would they even remember you? Would you even know what to say? Would you two be able to handle seeing someone part of your past that only now lives in your memories and forgotten photographs? What would it be like if I were to meet you again?

aadambautistaa: Parents. We have all heard it over and over...

Sun, 12 May 2013 14:32:51 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Parents.

We have all heard it over and over again: that time flies. But it’s still odd to think that we were once kids who were on playgrounds and could one day be watching our own kids as they swing. And sometimes I think about how crazy it is how much my future children won’t know about my life before them.

Don’t you ever wonder what your mom or dad was like when they were younger? Sometimes it’s almost impossible to imagine them at our age - to imagine them dealing with problems that we face or having feelings that mirror our own. It’s easy to forget that our parent had to take the path in growing up where they face problems and felt misunderstood and lost.

And it makes me wonder, how my kids will see me one day. Sure they will hear the stories and may even find those blogs I had that stood the test of time - but they will never know all the secrets that were kept, all the drama we faced, all the sadness that consumed us, and all the people who defined us. I wonder if they might one day feel misunderstood ; a feeling most kids know all to well. It’s weird to think our parents had to deal with finding their way in life, love, and themselves - just like we are - and just like how our kids will one day.

aadambautistaa: Can’t Sleep. Do you know those nights where you...

Sat, 11 May 2013 03:03:14 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Can’t Sleep.

Do you know those nights where you just can’t sleep? It’s as if the moment you just want to close your eyes is the time where your mind feels like it’s the best opportunity to begin racing with thoughts, memories, and ideas. As you try searching for an off switch, you realize that there may not even be one and you will just have to deal with another restless night. And for few hours, you become a philosopher as you questioning the meaning of life and why the world is the way it is. You become a storyteller as you come up with creative scenarios in your head that may never occur. You become a historian as you able to remember your past while missing or regretting it. In this insomniac time, you lie wide awake trying to figure out your life when all you want to do is to stop thinking.

And the weirdest thing is how alone we feel during these moments. How it feels like we’re the only one awake as people a dreaming in another realm. But truth is, those nights that we can’t sleep, there is someone else out there too. There is someone driving the empty roads hoping that it will bring some clarity. There is someone who is on the internet, listening to music, or watching TV as they are hoping it will take their minds of the things they don’t want to think about. And there is someone like you, just laying in bed thinking. Letting their mind race with their deepest thoughts. At the darkness of night, thousands of souls are awake with you…not being able to sleep.

aadambautistaa: Reunion. Can you imagine being in a large room...

Sat, 11 May 2013 00:41:29 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Reunion.

Can you imagine being in a large room that is filled with all the people you have encountered in your life? A room filled with with various people; from those who you have lost touch with, to strangers you only talked to once, to those you wished you would of never encountered again, to even those inviduals that were already taken away from you once by death.

What would you do if you were in a room like this, reunited with literally everyone that has been part of your life? Would you try to catch up and share memories with old friends that you drifted so far apart from and suddenly realized how much you missed them? Would people you no longer recognize, even just strangers, come up to you and make you realize you affected their lives more than you thought you would of? Would you continue to avoid some people like they were the plague or be glad you were reunited with forgotten faces? And would you finally take that opportunity to tell things you always regretted not saying to those people you no longer see?

I wonder how many people you would remember or if they would even remember who you are. It easily goes unnoticed how many people have been part of your life, even for just a second. In a way, it would just be interesting to see everyone placed in one room, every character that was part of your story, realizing how many people you have encountered and how many lives you were apart of.

aadambautistaa: Man Without A Purpose. There are times when I...

Thu, 09 May 2013 04:09:41 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Man Without A Purpose.

There are times when I feel like I am a man without a purpose. If you could imagine a busy and crowded New York street where people are hurrying towards their destinations, I would be that man who stood still in the middle of the chaos watching the world pass me by. It wouldn’t be because I’m lost or admiring the those who hurry pass, but rather it’s as if I’m waiting for something that may never even come.

There are people who stop to talk to me; some are stop longer than others, but eventually they all scurry off to achieve their personal goals and dreams leaving me behind. To be honest, this spot I stand on can be really lonely at times. I can’t help but wonder how people know where they are going - did they manage to get a manual on life that was mistakenly not given to me or was I the mistake?

It’s tough to be without a purpose. I don’t have that problem of being lost - but rather the problem of having no path to get lost on. I don’t know if I’m just waiting to be inspired, to fall in love, or to finally find the courage or enlightened moment to start searching for a purpose - but I would not know how to even begin this search. I guess I’m just at that standstill point in my life. I just don’t know what I want, I don’t know where to go, and I don’t know what to do. But I hope one day that I will.

aadambautistaa: Alternate Reality. Sometimes I wonder if an...

Wed, 08 May 2013 00:13:52 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Alternate Reality.

Sometimes I wonder if an alternate reality exists. A place where one different choice in our lives was made that had implications that completely changed the reality that we are now aware of. Do you remember those moments where you hit those crossroads in life and had to make a decision without knowing where the path you have chosen would take you? Don’t you ever wonder how life would of turned out if you had just picked the other path. Would you be happier, sadder, or even alive still?

We make choices every single day. The choice of going up to someone and talking to them could be the difference of meeting a life long friend to just seeing another stranger. The decision of taking the short cut home compared to the long way could be the difference of having an unforgettable experience to having just another day. Even that choice of appreciating every moment can alter the level of happiness you have.

Every choice we make affects us and everyone around us. Our choices defines who we are, who we become, and how we feel about ourselves and our surroundings. I can’t help but wonder if there are realities in which different choices were made; where my world would be completely different than it is right now.

aadambautistaa: Spilling Out Your Soul. Each day, I set out to...

Fri, 03 May 2013 21:35:18 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Spilling Out Your Soul.

Each day, I set out to conquer the tribulations of life as I step out onto the battlefield of the real world and put on a mask. This mask conceals my true identity in a attempt to deceive those who surround me; to protect my soul from being tainted by the harsh judgement of others.

It is only now, behind this overused mask, that I have started to notice those who sit across from me on a train, a bus, or waiting room. I see mouthes that a curved to portray a smile upon a strangers face. I seen eyes staring far off in a distant land as a stranger immerses themselves in deep thought. And I have seen tears form representing a sadness that is only felt from within.

I’ve seen strangers faces portray emotions day after day, and i’m only starting to realize this men and women and wearing masks as well. And it hits me; theses masks we all put on do not work as well as as I once thought they did. Everyday there is a crack in our masks that’s spilling out our souls. All we have to do is look closely enough at someone or get to know them a bit more to see pass this mask we put up. It reminds me if we just stop to get to know someone - it’s easy to realize there is much more than what meets the eye.

aadambautistaa: We’re Suppose To Have Tomorrow. We’re suppose...

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 23:43:22 -0400

aadambautistaa:

We’re Suppose To Have Tomorrow.

We’re suppose to have tomorrow. To wake up in the morning and have a second chance on everything that we have forgotten, were too lazy, or too scared to have done the day before.

Maybe we have taken today for granted, expecting that there is guarantee of tomorrow in a world filled with uncertainty. But what guarantee is there that you’ll have tomorrow to tell someone you love them? Or to tell someone you’re proud of them? Tell me, can you be sure that you’ll have tomorrow to say you’re sorry, to take a unbelievable risk, or just to live life for one last time?

We’re suppose to have a tomorrow, but life doesn’t always give us what we want, but rather robs us of it. So take advantage of right now, and do everything and anything while you still have the chance too.

aadambautistaa: Sheer Coincidence or Fate? Have you ever...

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 21:43:36 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Sheer Coincidence or Fate?

Have you ever wondered how in the world some people have made it into your life? Was it coincidence that you met your best friend because you were placed in the same class or was it because of something more? Was it due to random chance that you met someone that you share a bond with that you could never imagine sharing with anyone else? Is life just a series of unplanned events of sheer coincidences that causes you to meet those people who have big parts of your life, face tragic events that have helped define you as a person, or caused you to be at a certain place at a certain time when something forever changes your life?

Or could fate really exist? Could our destinies be already set and we are just seeing it through? Really, what were the chances of being reacquainted with someone from the past years later and them eventually becomes your closest friend? Could fate be responsible for all the events leading up to you getting lost to class and meeting a person in an otherwise empty hallway that you end up falling for? Could these unexplained events in our lives that can only be described as “life changing” and surprising be pure chance? Are they sheer coincidence or fate?

aadambautistaa: Yearbook Pictures trapped within the pages of...

Sat, 13 Apr 2013 21:15:14 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Yearbook

Pictures trapped within the pages of old year books are evidence of how much has changed.

Strangers you once passed by in the hallways everyday remain forgotten, buried in your past.

Ageless faces of those “best friends forever” who have drifted away from you life, stares at you relentlessly questioning why you guys don’t talk anymore.

Old enemies remain glaring relentlessly, as to remind you how useless it was spend precious time on silly fights.

The teachers who taught you lessons to help you live life, stay still and forgotten..unknowingly to you how much they helped you grow.

You see the pictures of those people who are still in your life and people you have loved, and memories flashes through your mind making everything seem like it was just yesterday.

Or there is the face of the person you didn’t risk your humiliation with, yet still makes you heart skips a beat, making you question what could of been.

These are the pictures of those who defined you as a youth. They are the evidence that time truly flashes before your eyes. These fading pictures become your reminder to take advantage of what we have right now, for soon they will be only a distant memory.

aadambautistaa: Vanished. You were in front of me. I could of...

Sat, 13 Apr 2013 19:51:12 -0400

aadambautistaa:

Vanished.

You were in front of me. I could of swore it. For just a second I closed my eyes for a momentary blink. That’s all it took. When they opened again you were gone. I questioned my sanity for how could something so beautiful disappear in thin air without a trace. I waited hopelessly in silence wishing that you would reappear. By as days wore on, the hope became dimmer like a dying flickering light of a candle.

I can’t understand how someone so important to me could leave without saying goodbye. I felt a dark chillness that came from within; I’ve heard that some people have diagnosed it as depression. But that word even seems inadequate as it fails to properly describe this emotion that has placed a firm grasp on me.

I swear you must of been a magician to pull off this vanishing trick. A master thief for stealing part of me that I know will never be returned. An award winning actress to have me believing you cared. But maybe you were just a figment of my imagination because I can not begin to comprehend how someone who was once so important to me be part of a reality in where we never cross paths again. I have a dying desire that this is all just a bad nightmare that I’m waiting to wake up from, but in my heart I know it is not, and you truly have vanished.